Every once in a while I get that Request for Recommendation from LinkedIn. I’m sure you get them too.

While I am genuinely flattered that somebody values my opinion about them enough to ask me for a recommendation and I love giving them, sometimes that request leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

Such was the case just this past week and this particular one was a double no-no.

Out of the blue a person I don’t even know send me a “recommendation request”.  Unfortunately, this has happened before and it really makes me very uncomfortable. What made this request even worse was the fact that this person included a shameless promotion for his business.

What was he thinking?

Was he expecting me to just make something up and write a fake recommendation?

Ehm, sorry, but I don’t do that. I don’t make things up. If I don’t know you I won’t recommend you.  I have too much to lose. I am not going to put my credibility and my good name on the line just to make you look good. Uhuh!

Yes, recommendations are extremely powerful because they add credibility and social proof and they give you a lot more validity in what you do. So the more you have the better, right?

Well yes probably. But wouldn’t you rather have someone recommending you who really knows you and can give their honest opinion about you than getting a bunch of generic recommendations that could fit just about anybody?

Before you ask for a recommendation on LinkedIn (or any other place) consider this…

• Use the system within LinkedIn to send your recommendation request rather than sending your own email.
• Only ask people who know you well enough to recommend you. Maybe you’ve done some work for them, been to company events together or helped them out in some way. You don’t want to make someone feel uncomfortable. Or, and that may be just as bad or worse, receive a recommendation that totally misrepresents you.
• If you have never worked together and only know each other online, make sure the person you ask to recommend you knows your personality, your character, your work ethics, what makes you different and stand out. You want to have had some kind of interaction with them where they remember you from so they can genuinely endorse you.
• The best way to get a recommendation is to give one first. Lewis Howes recommends doing just that in his Linked Influence course.  But be genuine and sincere. People can “smell” if your intentions are honorable or if you “just want something in return.”
• Apropos, talking about “return.” Be kind, return the favor and reciprocate!

You kind of get my drift, don’t you? What I am getting at is….

Don’t ask a complete stranger out of the blue…
”Can You Recommend Me?”

That makes that person very uncomfortable and quite frankly, doesn’t say very much about you either.

By the way, getting a recommendation request from a complete stranger really makes me think twice about adding just anyone who sends me a request to join their network on LinkedIn. I will be much more selective in the future as to whom I will add to my network and whom I’m just going to ignore.

Especially on a professional social network like LinkedIn it is more about quality than quantity. With more than 101 million members LinkedIn is the 3^rd largest social network and growing at a steady pace. You want to make sure you conduct yourself in a professional manner.

So, what has been your experience with getting a recommendation request? I always love your feedback so make sure you share it in the comment section below.

To Your Massive Success!

Ilka Flood
The Enlightened Networker

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