A Sure-Fire Way To Get Scratched Off Of My Friends List
| Posted in Facebook, Social Networking | Posted on 29-03-2010
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Or …What NOT To Do When You Receive A Friend Request At Your Social Network
Ouch! Someone hit me over the head with a baseball bat again. Not literally, of course, but it hurts just as much and it had me run for the Aspirin.
Over the weekend, I invited several people to be my friend at one of the top social networks. Unfortunately, one person mistook it as an invitation to spam me with his business opportunity. Now, I will give this gentleman the benefit of doubt and assume he didn’t know any better. But this is a sure-fire way to get scratched off of my friends list. Like most social network members, I am there to build relationships.
Don’t take your clothes off on the very first date …
Spamming people who sent you a friends request with your business opportunity, is like taking your clothes off on the very first date. It accomplishes absolutely nothing. Rather it sends people running. Not a good way to start a relationship.
Let me ask you this …
If your husband (or wife) would have asked you to marry them on your very first date, would you have said “YES?” I certainly wouldn’t have. My (future) husband would have scared me off and I would have run for the hills. And what a shame that would have been, because I would have never found out what a great guy he is.
So please, don’t make that mistake. Don’t rob people of the opportunity to get to know you, by spamming them with your business opportunity on your first ‘Social Media Date’. Don’t make them scratch you off of their friends list.
Instead…
- Get to know them.
- Share some valuable information with them.
- Offer your help.
- Start a discussion by asking questions about their family, their hobbies, etc.
- Comment on their pictures or on their bio or status.
- Get involved and find out if you have common interests
People will buy from and/or join people they know, like and trust. So give them a chance to get to know you as a person first. Eventually they will ask you the $64,000 question … “What do you do?”
What kind of behavior do you dislike? In other words, what makes you drop people off of your friends list? What tips can you share on how to social network in online communities? Please share them with us in the comment box below.
And by the way, if you like this post, please don’t forget to retweet it and share it with your Facebook friends.
Carla J Gardiner
Ryan Biddulph
Stacy
Hi Ilka,
I’ve experienced this numerous times.
I remember one time I updated my status that said to the affect that, to run a home business does not mean to invite everyone you come across to join their business opportunity.
Whatever happened to building rapport first? You know…
I feel your pain and I like how you approached this.
Jerome Ratliff
Jerome Ratliff´s last blog ..Google’s Love for WordPress
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 29th, 2010 at 3:43 pm
Hi Jerome,
Hope you had a great weekend!
Yes, it’s really sad that some people slam their own door in their face. What a shame! I just hope they wise up or they won’t get far in this industry.
Thanks for dropping by and have an awesome week!
Ilka
[Reply]
Hi Ilka,
That is something that happens to me regularly on Twitter. It recently happened on FaceFook and the “gentleman” additionally had the audacity to critique my blog and told me I would never make it because I had a child at home.
Then he a day later spammed me with his biz.
Evidently he was raised in a barn or something.
Another pet peeve of mine is when someone asks me a question that is clearly on my profile or info page. They clearly didn’t take the time to look….bu-bye!
I do exactly what you mention above; visit their profile, try to find something in common, if nothing at least comment on a picture or something and ALWAYS thank them for accepting my friendship.
Keep up the good work!
Twila
Twila Jacobs´s last blog ..Is Your Social Circle Holding You Back Personally and Professionally?
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 29th, 2010 at 4:36 pm
Hi Twila,
Thank you for taking time out of your very busy schedule to stop by and leave me your thoughts! I truly appreciate that.
If we just take the time to get to know people first, everything else will be a natural progression.
Have an awesome day!
Ilka
[Reply]
I laughed, I cried, I reminisced…this used to be me, too. Thank goodness I ran into some wonderfully patient teachers on the social media front that took their time to share this NUGGET with me early on as I was learning the art of building relationships online.
If you are new out there and this offends you, please don’t let it…it is given in love. Think about a parent who watches the youngster hit his/her cousin. The parent wouldn’t sit by and let it go! No, lovingly they would show the child how to solve the problem by NOT hitting, right? So, this post is simply your online parent stopping you from hitting someone and redirecting you in the right direction to be successful.
If you get this golden nugget and work on this aspect of your development, you will rise like cream on fresh milk.
Carla J Gardiner
http://CarlaJGardiner.com
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 29th, 2010 at 4:40 pm
Hi Carla,
Thank you so much for leaving me your kind thoughts!
You know you really have a gift. You should go into coaching or something. You have such a sweet touch of putting things. … I am way more direct
You are right though, it was all meant in the most loving way.
I’m glad I made you laugh today. Laughter is like a ‘mini vacation.’
Have an awesome evening!
Ilka
[Reply]
Hi Ilka,
Unfortunately this is common on Facebook. I can’t figure out what they are thinking when they do this…
My older sister is also a network marketer and she forwarded me this conversation between her and this man who did that very thing.
It was actually a very entertaining read.
She confronted him politely and asked if his approach actually worked. She found it offensive and just wondered how effective it was.
Boy was he defensive back! Called her all sorts of things and declaring that she must be very new to marketing online.
Some people just don’t get it…
Thanks for bringing it up. More people need to hear this message!
All the Best!
Susanna
Susanna Hess´s last blog ..Get Your Ad On TV – What Are You Waiting For?
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 29th, 2010 at 9:01 pm
Hi Susanna,
Hmm, interesting! I cannot imagine that anyone would be successful using this approach. It’s flat out rude. Okay, I will forgive someone who’s still new to the industry but not seasoned networkers.
Thanks for stopping by and have an awesome day!
Ilka
[Reply]
Susanna Hess Reply:
March 30th, 2010 at 5:51 am
Hey Ilka,
Using yes…. but using it with success…? I seriously doubt it.
I’m sure it won’t be long till that guy either burns out on that approach, or wakes up and figures out a better approach.
[Reply]
Lol, I agree with this 100%. This is exactly what I teach in my Social MLM Secrets course.
It’s amazing how much spam we get from new friends on Facebook. People just need to be educated.
Rather than un friending me, I just teach them how to do it the right way. Many times these people have never done anything like this before and just need a friendly person to show them the ropes
I’ve sponsored many people by doing this.
Great post, thanks
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 30th, 2010 at 10:14 am
Hi Gavin,
Nice to meet you and thanks for leaving your thoughts. (By the way, our oldest son is named Gavin.)
I agree with you about educating people. That’s why I said, I’ll give this gentleman the benefit of doubt and assume he didn’t know any better. But there are people out there, who’ll spam you over and over again regardless of how nicely you told them not to.
Have an awesome day!
Ilka
[Reply]
Susanna! Great advice! Thanks! It is all about the relationship!
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 30th, 2010 at 10:32 am
Hi Tracy,
Thanks for stopping by! It’s very nice to meet you.
Enjoy your day!
Ilka
[Reply]
Hi Ilka,
I’ve definitely run into this on Facebook and Twitter!
I like your approach, though — you’re not scolding people, you’re trying to help them do better.
Have a great day,
Derek
Derek Alvarez´s last blog ..The best way to succeed in MLM is to never talk about your company?!
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 30th, 2010 at 1:53 pm
Hi Derek,
Great to see you! Thanks for your thoughts on this issue!
It seems to be worse on Twitter than Facebook. Almost every single DM I get says something like … Oh, by the way, check this out.
Yep, I’ll be right over
Enjoy your day!
Ilka
[Reply]
I don’t think they will ever learn!
I get it to sometimes.
Its always the same silly script as well, very annoying.
I guess in life there has to be a balance, so if we are doing things the right way, then there has to be people doing it the wrong way!
Dwayne
Dwayne Huggins´s last blog ..By: Dwayne Huggins
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 31st, 2010 at 9:37 am
Hi Dwayne,
I agree, those silly scripts are annoying and don’t accomplish anything.
I guess you’re right about there having to be a balance. But I’d love to see the scale tilted a little more for the BETTER
Make it a great day and thanks for stopping by!
Ilka
[Reply]
So, that’s where I am going wrong! I will never take my clothes off on a first date ever again! (ha)
On a serious not, that is one of the worst things when you get attacked by a new friend spamming you with biz opp sales pitches. It makes me cringe!
Lets hope they read your post and learn the right way to do it.
Wayne Vassell, signing out…
Wayne Vassell´s last blog ..List Building Techniques – How To Build A Mailing List? Spoon Feed and Keep Them Begging For Info!
[Reply]
Ilka Flood Reply:
March 31st, 2010 at 11:19 am
Haha, I LOVE your sense of humor, Wayne! You’re precious!
Yes, I sure hope the message gets out there. It would save us on bandages and aspirin
Have an awesome day!
Ilka
[Reply]
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